


The Waves

by Misaya



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drabble, Established Levi/Erwin Smith, Established Relationship, Hospitals, Light Angst, M/M, Memories, Oneshot, i don't want to put any more tags because it's too much foreshadowing, i want it to be a surprise - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-14
Updated: 2015-05-14
Packaged: 2018-03-30 14:15:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3939886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misaya/pseuds/Misaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The waves crest in peaks and swells that glide effortlessly into the slipstream of Erwin's consciousness, and not for the first time, he wonders if Levi can hear him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Waves

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TwistedK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwistedK/gifts).



> A prompt taken from 'I Dare You to Write' on Tumblr:
> 
> "I dare you to write something including: 'I found it in the sand. It just reminded me of...' 'I know.' Minor edits made for the purposes of adaptation. 
> 
> For TwistedK, for being a fantastic beta and friend.
> 
> -M

The waves crested, one slipping into the next into the slipstream of Erwin's consciousness, as he slid open the glass door to Levi's room. 

"Hey." His voice was quiet as he pulled up a chair next to his bed. He was still asleep, the fans of his eyelashes brushing soft shadows onto her cheeks. Erwin reached out, tucked a wisp of charcoal hair behind Levi's ear. 

Levi didn't react, didn't even stir. Erwin wondered if Levi was dreaming about him, wondered if he could dream at all. 

"I went to the beach today," he said. The waves continued on, relentless in their march towards the shore, and he cleared his throat, trying to make himself heard above their incessant pulsing. "I went to the one on Venice, the one you don't like because it's too crowded. Too many tourists, and, more horrifyingly, too many children."

He might have been imagining it, and probably was, but he thought he saw the corners of Levi's mouth twitch upwards. 

"I guess you've just got to go really early in the morning," Erwin continued, reaching into his coat pocket. He rummaged around for a bit, before withdrawing his hand, fingers curled into a loose fist around something. 

"I found it in the sand. It just reminded me of you." 

Erwin takes one of Levi's hands in his own, wraps slack fingers around the perfect pale spiral of a conch's shell.

His lack of response bolsters Erwin's desire to explain, and he hastens towards his memories. 

"It's the color of the strawberry milkshake you spilt in my car after I'd just had it detailed. You remember how angry I was?" Erwin grinned, reminiscing, and trying to ignore the fact that Levi wasn't contributing to the conversation. "You got angry right back at me, claiming I'd taken that last turn way too fast. You were probably right."

"It's the same color as the tie you wore to my sister's wedding, even though the color scheme was supposed to be green and blue. I remember you scoffing as you searched through the ties in the department store and claimed that none of the green or blue ones suited your skin tone quite as well. You were the only one wearing a different color, but you didn't care, and I think I've always really adored that part of you." Erwin chuckled, squeezing Levi's fingers in his own, waiting for a response that never came.

The peaks and swells of the machines continued to break over the crests of his words, filling the silence with their monotony. The early morning sunlight slowly danced across the room, painting swathes of gold along the mint walls in their path towards the sunset.

"Remember when you found out we got approved for adoption? It reminds me of the color you wanted to paint the nursery, because you were so convinced we were going to get to adopt a little girl who would love reading and staying tidy like you." Erwin's voice cracked, and he struggled to regain control. "And I said that we shouldn't settle on anything yet, because sometimes people and machines make mistakes. Had I known this would happen, I'd have let you paint the damn room any color you wanted."

The light was starting to fade, the hours eaten hungrily away, and Levi's features were starting to melt into the dusk.

"You were wearing a sweater that color that day. And...and..." Erwin choked on his words. "And I'm so sorry for what happened. It should have been me." Tears cut familiar, well traveled paths against his skin. "You didn't want to drive, but I insisted because I was tired after visiting Mom and Dad, and because you never drive and I didn't want you to be stuck somewhere and helpless in some sort of emergency. But I didn't account for drunk drivers."

Levi said nothing, but the set of his mouth seemed to convey that he agreed exactly with Erwin's sentiments. His breathing was even and slow, a steady thrum in contrast to the shaking gulps of air Erwin was swallowing. 

A soft rap on the door behind him made him startle. Erwin jumped, wincing as a shock of pain jolted up his spine. The glass door slid open, releasing a whoosh of cool air, and the soft, steady tread of rubber-soled shoes approached the bed.

The nurse placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Mr. Smith," she said softly, her voice barely audible over the rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor and the machines keeping Levi alive. "Visiting hours have been over for a while now."

Erwin swiped a sleeve across his eyes, rubbing away the traces of his grief. "Right, sorry to keep you," he said, his voice still thick with sorrow. "I'll just be on my way then." As he stood up, letting Levi go, his fingers slackened around the shell, letting it click to the floor. The nurse bent down, picked it up. She examined it for a moment before setting it on the bedside table and turning to him, apologetic.

"Maybe you'll have better luck tomorrow," she suggested gently, well meaning, but Erwin knew the chances of that were close to none. 

"Maybe," he agreed nonetheless, taking one last look at Levi, motionless and unchanged, before turning and allowing the riptide of his guilt to push him away. 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Shore](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3948568) by [Misaya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misaya/pseuds/Misaya)




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